COMMUNICATION CREATES TRANSPARENCY

 COMMUNICATION    CREATES     TRANSPARENCY

Transparency can help you have the healthy relationship that you want. However, it’s not something that most people have. Spouses that want to see each other’s phones are judged and considered controlling simply because they are feeling insecure. 

People hide financial habits from one another. Laughing about it behind their spouse’s back has become the norm. This can lead to a strained relationship that is full of problems. Being more open with one another, however, can lead to a relationship built on trust and honesty.

How To Have Transparency In A Relationship

Most people think that transparency means being brutally honest about your feelings. While being honest is important, it’s also important to consider the other person’s feelings when talking. There is a lot more to being transparent in a relationship than giving your partner the cold, hard truth or explaining every grueling detail of your workday. 

These tips can help us have healthier relationships.

1. Focus on honesty

One of the most important things that most couples struggle with is being truthful. When you hide things from your partner, you’ll find that it slowly spills over into the entire relationship. Instead, always be honest, even if the truth might hurt their feelings. 

Often, we do this for our own personal interests. It doesn’t do our partner any favors. Don’tlie to protect them. You also should never lie to avoid conflict. 

2. Be emotionally transparent

When you are honest, it also means no more lies about your feelings. When you’re feeling emotionally distant, you need to be honest about why. Explain to your partner if you are having work and life issues, and how it’s affecting you. When you do this, it can help you and your partner work together as a team. You’ll quickly start to see intimacy grow in your relationship. 

Some couples struggle with this step in particular. Often, this is because of a miscommunication between two people. One person may invalidate the other person’s feelings. Often, couples create an environment that is not emotionally safe. It can lead to a breakdown in communication, and in both people not feeling comfortable working through their problems. 

If you see this pattern in your relationship, consider seeking help from a professional therapist. Couples therapy can go a long way in helping two people learn to talk to each other about both problems in the relationship and their feelings. 

3. Share thoughts and feelings

In healthy relationships, both people are able to share what’s going on inside their heads. Close relationships evolve over an extended time period of two people being able to do just that. Talk to your partner about your daily life. Practice active listening skills when they talk about theirs. This can go a long way in helping you both build transparency in the relationship. 

4. Deal with defensive feelings nicely

While you and your partner work on expressing yourselves and sharing, there are going to be times that one of you feels defensive. How you react to those feelings can have a significant impact on your relationship. 

Use effective communication. Practice using “I” statements to discuss how your partner made you feel. Then, work through those issues as they come up instead of letting them fester or deteriorate.

Atta'sblog

TO BE CONTINUED.....

HAVE A NICE WEEKEND

http://attabempong.blogspot.com

TRAIN YOURSELF

TRAIN YOURSELF

WHAT you do for yourself counts far more than all that others have done or can do for you

Self-discipline is the most important feature in any life.

Unless you put yourself under mental discipline, you will never develop the forces in you that are valuable to the commercial world.

 

Rule your temper so that no matter what happens, what is said or done, your temper will be under absolute control.

The man who does not rule his temper can never achieve the success that belongs to him.

He destroys the building that he erects.

Govern your tongue, so that it will say nothing that will injure anyone around you.

 

Practically all the injury that is done to a character, to a business, a home, or a person, is done with words.

It is tongue work. The man or woman who makes no contribution to destructive thought and talk is a valuable asset anywhere.

 

He is deaf to anything that is destructive to another.

He is blind to anything that folks around him do.

He cannot speak of it. He has mastery of himself.

The efficiency of an office force is reduced sometimes by 50 percent by idle, unkind words.

The man who can govern his temper, his tongue, and his appetite, though he has but mediocre ability, is bound to get to the top.

Gaining the mastery of these will be among your first real victories.

 

It is controlled power that is valuable.

That waterfall is simply beautiful. It has no commercial value until it is harnessed.

It is the harnessed ability in you that is worthwhile, an ability under intelligent mastery.

Find out what you wish to be or do, then train yourself for it.

 

What you have undeveloped in you has no value. No one else either wishes or has the time to develop it. That is your business.

The training is all done by you.

If you have a voice, put yourself under a teacher; then work and carry out the teacher's instructions.

If it is art, put yourself under a competent instructor and obey the laws of art and work.

Nothing will take the place of hard work, intelligently directed. Talents in you need push and determination to make them worth money.

It is you, and you alone, who will do the developing.

The lazy person who waits for something to turn up is a failure.

 

The only things that will turn up are rent and bills.

Nothing will take the place of self-denial and hard work.

It is easy to become a failure; all you need to do is to idly dream.

It is the man who wills and keeps on willing who wins. Don't float. Don't wait for an opportunity. Go make your opportunity.

 

Put your whole self into life. Study, drive yourself.

Always remember that your worst enemy is inside of you.

No circumstance, no person or combination of persons can conquer you as long as you do not destroy your own prospects yourself.

Don't be satisfied with anything you do. Always seek to improve yourself.

Sign-Posts on the Road to Success

Have a lovely weekend.

Atta's blog

The Importance Of Communication In Marriage

 

The Importance Of Communication In                               Marriage(part one)

But one factor that seems to be talked about much less is communication (ironic, right?). The way a married couple discusses their issues, or if they discuss anything at all, is crucial to a sustained and fulfilling marriage. If you are still wondering why is communication important in a relationship or how important is communication for a married couple, read on.

Why is communication important?

The importance of communication in marriage is often not taken seriously as many couples tend to think that the daily banter or the lack of it doesn’t affect them on a day-to-day basis. But communication is the vehicle through which all other important parts of marriage are performed. If you love someone, but you don’t use your words and your actions to communicate it, you’re not doing right by your partner. If you trust someone, let them know it. Communicate it to them. If you can communicate honestly, your marriage has a good chance of being happy and healthy. In fact, the importance of communication should be considered right from the courtship days as it sets the right foundation of the relationship.

Open husband and wife communication is the cornerstone of any and every long and loving marriage. The problem is that some people just aren’t good at it. Let’s take some time to understand the importance of communication in marriage and see what forms of marital communication will create the atmosphere of a strong and caring marriage.

Communication as a cornerstone

Love, trust, honesty, and every other important characteristic of a strong marriage aren’t meaningful in themselves. It is the expression of these things that produces a marriage worth envying. Showing that love, showcasing your trust, and acting honestly is where the magic is. Being able to communicate how much your wife or husband means to you is where your marriage goes from good to great. 

Communication is more than just speaking, though. There is verbal communication, nonverbal communication, and physical acts that can be placed under the umbrella of communication. Let’s have a look at these different types of communication which will help you understand the importance of communication in marriage in a better way.

Types of Communication in Marriage

Verbal communication

Everyone likes to hear that they look nice. Everyone likes to hear that they are loved. Verbal communication, being able to express how you feel to your spouse through the words that you speak, is essential to effective communication. 

If you love someone with all of your heart, but you don’t say it enough, the other person may never understand just how deeply they are loved. If you appreciate your spouse but never speak up about it, that appreciation holds less value. Being able to tell your spouse how wonderful they are will make them feel loved, appreciated, and in touch with how you feel. Such type of communication is key to a long-term relationship. So if you understand the importance of communication in marriage, you will not take verbal communication with your partner lightly.

Along with expressions of pleasure, you have to be able to speak up about what you’re not happy with. Communication between married couples is imperative to marital happiness. If your spouse is doing something that bothers you to your core, but you’re silent on the subject, your lack of communication and trust will only allow the action to continue. You can’t go through life with your wife or husband holding all of your dissatisfaction inside. Letting it out is necessary and healthy for your relationship. This should be done in a tactful and warm manner, but don’t wait until it’s too late to say something that you need to. The lack of communication in a marriage, especially verbal, can take a huge toll on the mental health of both partners.

Nonverbal communication

We’ve all said something to a friend, family member, or spouse that was met with an unpleasant facial expression. That person didn’t have to say a word, but they told a story with their face. It’s not just facial expressions, either. Us humans say a lot more with our bodies than we give ourselves credit for.

When we talk about the importance of communication in marriage, we cannot underplay nonverbal communication. Be aware of how your body language is communicating with your partner. If you’re hunched over and closed off while trying to have an important conversation, your partner will subconsciously feel that lack of vulnerability. Face your husband or wife and keep your body language open when having difficult conversations. No leg crossing. No arm crossing. Your body should show your spouse that you are open to hearing what they have to say and are willing to work through it. 

There are plenty of nonverbal cues similar to a closed-off posture that are communicating either negatively or positively to your partner without any words being exchanged. Be more conscious and thoughtful about how your body expresses your feelings. The importance of effective nonverbal husband and wife communication cannot be underlined enough. To say the least, it can be a major pivot in de-escalating a lot of conflicting situations. 

Physical acts

Making dinner. Going to the grocery store. Taking out the garbage. Going on an ice cream run for your pregnant wife.

All of these aren’t things that you say; they are things that you do that show your spouse that you care about them. In doing these small and thoughtful acts, you are communicating your love for them without saying much at all. When we talk about the importance of communication in relationships, such physical acts go a long way for couples who may not be that great with verbal communication.

The phrase “actions speak louder than words” fits appropriately with this form of communication. You could tell your wife you love her until you’re blue in the face, but it may not resonate as much as cleaning the house or changing the oil in her car. You could shower your husband with compliments, but making dinner for him, is maybe even more powerful than an “I love you”.

The importance of communication in marriage cannot be stressed enough. The open channels of communication ensure fewer misunderstandings and help in developing the relationship in a well-rounded manner.

Communication is essential to any successful marriage, but you can’t rely on just one of the three ways listed above. It will take a good balance of the trio to show your spouse how much they mean to you as time passes.

Tell your spouse what you love about them, but also don’t be afraid to voice your opinion if something is bothering you. That open and honest verbal communication will become an investment with a vast return as the years go by.

Show your spouse, through your body language, that you are being honest and open with them. Closing yourself off, covering your mouth when you speak, and making negative facial expressions are red flags to the observant eye. Be conscious of what your body is saying, and make the proper adjustments so that your wife or husband knows that you’re being genuine.

Use your actions to communicate your love, trust, and honesty with your partner. Buy them a thoughtful gift, give them a massage, or help them with a troubling task. Words don’t have to be spoken; your actions will speak for themselves.

So now that you understand the importance of communication in marriage and why effective communication is important between couples, start reaching out to your partner as a habit. Communicate early and often in your marriage. Make it an intentional practice between the two of you. Without an open and genuine dialogue between husband and wife, a marriage will meet more obstacles. Healthy communication is the foundation for a marriage that will help the marriage sustain through time.

MAY GOD BLESS ALL UNIONS...

Amen!

Have a lovely week

Atta'sblog.

Rise from hope to faith.

 

Rise from hope to faith.

 

 

What is Faith? Faith is be Step 1: 'Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word about Christ.' (Romans 10:17)   Faith comes from hearing the message which is heard through the word about Christ. Faith can ONLY be germinated in us when we hear the message through the word about Christ. Some people never have faith because they never try to hear the messages of God or they don't even consider what God tells them. During some of the darkest times of my life, I would often call one of my best friends, Barnard, to seek advice. And since he knew me well, he would always start our conversation with the question: 'Atta, what is God telling you?' He knew my ability to hear from God...   And this is the same question I am asking (especially if you are experiencing troubles): ' what is God telling you?' One of the reasons why James tells to pray during times of affliction (reference James 5:13) is to seek a word from God. After all, prayer is supposed to be the conversation. The word you will hear during prayer time will germinate faith in you.   Step 2   'Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen (Hebrews 11:1)   The germinated message you heard will create a substance. And in turn, the substance will create Hope. Once you hear the message from God, there will be Hope. Hope fuels the willingness to expect from the future. Hope fuels the willingness to look ahead into tomorrow. By speaking to you, God even goes further by creating a picture in your spirit. That picture is 'the evidence not seen to the naked eye'. For example, in the Old Testament, God would often describe the Promised Land as the 'Land of Milk and Honey'. By describing it that way, He wanted to place a picture in the Spirit of His people. That picture is the evidence not seen to the naked eye'. Not only you need Hope, but you also need evidence in the form of a picture planted in your spirit. When God spoke to Abraham about his descendants, He also used the stars and seashore sands as descriptive pictures (evidence) of the promise (reference Genesis 22:17). Sometimes, the problem with many is in the fact that they are 'Hope experts' but they never have a picture planted in their spirits. Hope is important but it has to be combined with a picture.   This is my question to you:'beyond hope, what is the picture planted in your spirit?'   It is important to have the evidence(picture) in your spirit because life will throw real physical images seen through the news or circumstances. And during those times, you will need the 'evidence' (picture) from God to refute and contrast what reality will project.   Step 3.   'Faith without works is dead'(James 2:26) Activate. In James 2:14-26, the Bible says a good number of things about faith. You see, my friend, for years after my conversation, I lived with the hope that things would change and progress just because. It is a good thing to hope but it can become dangerous to adopt permanent and perpetual residence in Hope. The Children of Israel had Hope for better tomorrows while in the desert but they refused to step up by fighting for the land. It was okay to hear about the 'Land of Milk and Honey' but when it was time to fight, they were afraid. Here is another example illustrating the danger of adopting perpetual residence in Hope: 'When Jesus came to Israel, most Jewish refused to recognize Him as the Messiah and instead, they decided to reside in the hope another messiah. Till today they are hoping.   The reason why so many of the visions and dreams given by God don't come to past is because the receivers are using 'dead faith'. Hope is good, but the Bible does not say that faith becomes alive through hope. Faith becomes alive with works (reference James 2:26).   As much as we believe in the existence of God, demons believe too! But the works of faith are a differentiator between them and us. This is where the line between heroes and villains is drawn.   Just like the Jewish people of Israel, we can remain stuck in one place by adopting Hope as a perpetual residence. It took me years of understanding the following principle:' Hope is good and necessary, but strategies are found in faith and love'.   Rick Page and professor Akande were right to say:'Hope is not a strategy'.   It is possible to dwell so much in hope to the point of thinking that you are advancing...while you are not.   'Hope fuels the desire to look towards the future. But when we live in faith, we DO according to what God says. Faith turns into reality the picture planted by God in our spirits.   Raise the level from Hope to Faith

DIVINE INTERVENTION

 DIVINE          INTERVENTION 

  ALMERE   PRAYER MEETING - (18/08/2020)

                (Exodus 14:15  & 16)

¹⁵ The Lord said to Moses, “Why do you cry to me? Tell the people of Israel to go forward

16 Lift up your staff, and stretch out your hand over the sea and divide it, that the people of Israel may go through the sea on dry ground.

 

Divine Intervention   Is when God steps in and changes the outcome of a situation. Basically, divine intervention is another way of saying ‘miracle.’

TYPES OF DIVINE INTERVENTION

1. Miraculous healing,

2. People being in the right place at the right time,

3. Circumstances that protected someone from harm’s way are all examples of  Divine Intervention.

There are many stories in the Bible that are perfect examples of ‘Divine Intervention.’ One of the more notable would be when God parted the red sea.

Daniel 3:24 – 30 ESV

²⁴ Then King Nebuchadnezzar was astonished and rose up in haste. He declared to his counselors, “Did we not cast three men bound into the fire?” They answered and said to the king, “True, O king.

25He answered and said, “But I see four men unbound, walking in the midst of the fire, and they are not hurt; and the appearance of the fourth is like a son of the gods.”

 

(KJV)

Acts 16:25-26

²⁵ And at midnight Paul and Silas prayed, and sang praises unto God: and the prisoners heard them.

²⁶ And suddenly there was a great earthquake so that the foundations of the prison were shaken: and immediately all the doors were opened, and every one's bands were loosed.

 

 

WITNESSING

    WEDNESDAY  PRAYERS(PIWC)29/09/2021                 

   

THEME:   WITNESSING

The Greek word for witness is martus.

Proverbs 11:30 (NKJV)

The fruit of the righteous is a tree of life, And he who wins souls is wise.

 

This quotation is reminding us there are professional work like Teachers, Pastor's social workers, etc ..

Are also, wise people.

 

Looking at this article shows that every Christian has an obligation to evangelize and that God creates opportunities for the spread of the gospel.

 

Acts 5:42 (NKJV)

And daily in the temple, and in every house, they did not cease teaching and preaching Jesus as the Christ.

What does it mean to be Chris's witness?

1 John 1:3 (NKJV) That which we have seen and heard we declare to you, that you also may have fellowship with

 

us; and truly our fellowship is with the Father and with His So Jesus Christ.

The witness is someone that has seen something take place and is there to tell of all that they saw, heard, and experienced.

 

John 14:27 (nkjv)

²⁷ Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.

John 17:22(njkv)

²² And the glory which You gave Me I have given them, that they may be one just as We are one:

The witness is someone that has seen something take place and is there to tell of all that they saw, heard, and experienced.

 

 Likewise, as Christians, we are called to be witnesses for Christ who present testimony about the truth that we have experienced and heard.

 

 

William Tyndale, the man who translated the Bible into English and was burnt alive at the ridiculously young age of 42 years old, for his efforts. (Google Foxe's Book of Martyrs.)

Nearly 500 years ago, this week, William Tyndale, fondly called 'Father of the English Bible' was strangled and burned at the stake after being tried and convicted of heresy and reason for translating the Bible into English.

HIS OFFENSE!

He translated the Greek Bible into English.

That you have a Bible in a language you can read is largely due to his labors, and many of the very phrases you read in it retain the flavor of his understanding of Greek and Hebrew.

A graduate of Oxford and Cambridge, Tyndale had a powerful desire to make the Bible available even to the common people in England, in order to correct the 'Biblical ignorance of the priests.' At one point Tyndale told a priest, "If God spares my life, are many years pass, I will cause a boy that driveth the plow, shall know more of the Scriptures than thou dost."

Today, 90% of the King James Version of the Holy Bible and 75% of the Revised Standard Version are from the translation made by Tyndale, a man to whom you owe more than you'll ever know.

A nice dream, but how was Tyndale to accomplish his task, when translating the Bible into English was ILLEGAL at the time?'

He went to London to ask Bishop Tunstall if he could be authorized to make an English translation of the Bible, but the Bishop would not grant his approval.

However, Tyndale would not let the disapproval of men stop him from carrying out what seemed so obviously God's will. With encouragement and support of some British merchants, he decided to go to Europe to complete his translation, then have it printed and smuggled back into England.

In 1524 Tyndale sailed for Germany. In Hamburg, he worked on the New Testament, and in Cologne, he found a printer who would print the work. However, news of Tyndale's activity came to an opponent of the Reformation who had the press raided.

Tyndale himself managed to escape with the pages already printed and made his way to the German city Worms where the New Testament was soon published.

Six thousand copies were printed and smuggled into England.

The Bishops did everything they could to eradicate the Bibles. Bishop Tunstall had copies ceremoniously burned at St. Paul's; the Archbishop of Canterbury bought up copies to destroy them. Tyndale used the money to print improved editions!

Tyndale continued hiding among the merchants in Antwerp and began translating the Old Testament while the King's agents searched all over England and Europe for him.

A copy of Tyndale's "The Obedience of a Christian Man" fell into the hands of Henry VIII, providing the king with the rationale to break the Church in England from the Roman Catholic Church in 1534.

In 1535, Tyndale was arrested and jailed in the castle of Vilvoorde (Filford) outside Brussels for over a year.

Tyndale’s work was denounced by authorities of the Roman Catholic Church and Tyndale himself was accused of heresy.

Tyndale, 42 was finally found by an Englishman who pretended to be his friend but then turned him over to the authorities. After a year and a half in prison, he was brought to trial for heresy -- FOR BELIEVING, among other things, IN THE FORGIVENESS OF SINS and that THE MERCY OFFERED IN THE GOSPEL WAS ENOUGH FOR SALVATION. In August 1536, he was condemned and was executed [burned alive at the stake] publicly on October 6, 1536, in a small town in Belgium.

As he burnt to death, Tyndale reportedly said "Lord, open the King of England's eyes."

WAS HIS PRAYER ANSWERED?

YES! The prayer was answered first in part when three years later, in 1539, Henry VIII required every parish church in England to make a copy of the English Bible available to its parishioners. Today, Tyndale's prayer is fully answered, not only are the King's eyes opened but the Bible a universal instrument.

* In 1611, the 54 scholars who produced the King James Bible drew significantly from Tyndale, as well as from translations that descended from his.

* In 2002, Tyndale was placed at number 26 in the BBC's poll of the 100 Greatest Britons; but in heaven, he surely would be before the preceding 25.

A very important and interesting piece of history worth knowing and appreciating by all believers.

And may it *challenge* us to spend quality time in this same glorious book that this great servant literally gave his life for.

Today it's hard to imagine the world without an English Bible, and there could now be as many as 900 of such translations in existence – but before Tyndale, it had never happened. He's known as the Father of the English Bible since the later, epochal work of the King James Version of the Bible largely consisted of Tyndale's scholarly and accessible translations.

The English language, as with scholarly understanding, continues to evolve – and so the work of Bible translation continues today.

But without the courage and genius of men like Tyndale, who challenged the status quo before them and died for doing so, it might never have been possible.